Is it art? Should I share this image with you-especially as my first blog post? The image is so deeply personal, and it doesn’t reflect my artist skill either, but I guess you can decide for yourself! In my current job, I work with victims of sexual and domestic violence. After working with a particularly disturbing scenario of a young woman who had been gang-raped several years ago, I found it hard to forget her heart-wrenching story. The longer story here is that she was actually “sexed” into a gang at the tender age of twelve. In my line of work this is not unusual, as young men are “jumped” into a gang as brothers and young women are “sexed” into a gang as a younger sister of the gang. This act however does not afford the “younger sister’s” the same rights and privileges of their male counter-parts. But this aspect of the criminal under-world is not the purpose of this post and some things are better left unexplained.
This young woman was not an atypical “victim” as they say, just the type of youth that is vulnerable to sexual exploitation by sexual predators. As a young girl she was told by her mother that she was the product/conceived by rape. She internalized this information by perceiving she was a “bad seed” and therefore fated to have a certain dark trajectory in her life. Myself and the nurse I was training that day took turns leaving the room together and separately to re-group and to strategize how to create a container of innocence, vulnerability and resilience for this young woman. Hopefully she received what she needed in the ensuing counseling we set up for her in the days that followed. On that day, it was clear to me that this young woman was deprived of her youthful innocence and some of her prideful talk was a call out for the protection and safety she was not afforded in her life. This interaction weighed heavy on my heart and I needed a deeper process to clear these images.
As a consequence, my search for materials at the thrift store the following day was quite interesting. I purchased an intriguing collection of items that seemed to speak directly to what I was feeling a need to express. There was a carved wooden door with a gate guarding the entryway, a wizard holding a lantern, a golden cup in the shape of a knight, a Raggedy-Ann doll tile, two cows sitting upon a plaid couch, and several other light-hearted images. Bringing these items to my studio, I assembled a scene to tie these items together by uniting them with a yellow-bricked road. The symbol of the “yellow-bricked road” for me, has always signified the mystical realm. One is on the proverbial path to see The Great Wizard, or to hear a truth that only the Great Oz could bestow. Finally, I used some deer bones to frame the corners of the assembled image to represent the inter-generational violence that often occurs in families. I have often reflected that the inter-vertibral cartilage of a deer’s spine is shaped as a heart. I have used both the bones and the cartilage of deer in my work at times. The gentle deer is also an important image in many spiritual traditions, and has appeared to me at important times in my life as well.
Besides hanging this image in the sexual assault exam room in which I worked, I have continued to share this story and a picture of this personal healing art-piece when I speak bi-annually to a sex offender program in the Harnett County men’s prison. The SOAR [Sex Offender Accountability and Responsibility] program is a unique, 26-week voluntary prison program for sex-offenders here in North Carolina. As a Forensic or SANE [Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner], it has been very important to me to work with the offenders of sexual violence. The artwork that resulted from this experience continues to provide a potent image and story of healing trauma, both my own and others. The concept of innocence lost is an important premise to up-hold for all people in all cultures. It also brings to mind the innocence that is lost by any child that is subjected to a violent environment. How many more children does this affect in areas of war and hunger? Acts of sexual violence are finally finding a deeper resolution and awareness in our culture, as evidenced by social movements such as the #MeToo campaign. I feel fortunate to have this opportunity to use art as an insightful doorway, both for survivors and offenders of violence, and this example perfectly integrates my life-longing to heal suffering and sooth the human spirit through artistic expression.
Thanks so much for reading this!
Theresa
